How has your childhood been, Khanzadi?
Since childhood, I was very mischievous, naughty, cute and famous. I had a lot of interest in acting, singing, and dancing. I used to keep on laughing and playing and people used to like me a lot. I used to do mimicry and everything so, the creativity was there till childhood. As soon as I grew up, I had to leave all those things but I wasn’t ready to give up. I was like, no, there’s only one life and the world is very big. I have to see, explore. I decided to run away from home.
You spoke about your childhood and how there were restrictions in your household. Did you ever get the support of your family?
No, I never got the support of my family. Only my mother, we all know a mother is a mother. She was the only one who understood. Whenever there was a cultural program at school. She used to just tell all these aunties to get clothes. jewelleries, whatever they wanted for the dance. They used to bring it secretly and my mother used to put it in the school bag secretly. And she would say, go and have fun. Only my mother knew.
Continued:
Everything was fine till childhood but as soon as I started growing up, the environment changed completely for me and there were restrictions. I couldn’t accept the changes and restrictions. Because since childhood, I was allowed to do everything I wanted. I had that in my mind that I can do everything and suddenly freedom was taken away from me. Then it will be painful. I was not able to relate to why the changes were happening suddenly.
So, when did you start rapping? Since when did you start writing secretly?
When I was in a wheelchair for 3 years and bed rest as well. I used to be in a wheelchair when I had to go to the doctor. Or. I had to go to the washroom. Otherwise, I used to lie down in the bed. So, during that time. I got to know Eminem. He became my inspiration. His covers, songs. I kept singing and listening to it. That’s how I decided, I wanted to become a rapper. When I came to Mumbai, I was completely lost. I started giving auditions for acting, but I never got selected because my Hindi was very bad. It is better now compared to that time. But earlier, it was worse. I couldn’t even speak properly. People used to make fun of me. Then, I tried a lot and worked on it. I tried modeling too, but there was no contact and maybe that’s why I couldn’t move forward. Then I remembered. What am I good at? In my life, during childhood I have won two prizes in school. I had won prizes for a singing competition and for a poem recitation. So, the full form of rap is. R.A.P. Rhythm and Poetry. That’s how I connected and now this is my goal in life. I chose hip-hop and my journey has been like this. Whatever I am, I am on my face. I am being real and hip-hop is what? Reality. So, I decided to be a rapper.
When you were struggling in Mumbai. You were giving auditions for acting. How was that phase and was there self-doubt because of rejection?
Not at all. I was very stubborn. I am stubborn so I never had a self-doubt. In anything else, sometimes I can have self-doubts but I can never have any doubts about my art. I never had a doubt. I was always confident. That God gives everyone a talent. A God-gifted talent. I might have it too. But I was not able to figure it out. I told myself there must be something, if I think a little. I will get a hint from somewhere and what I just told you. That was a hint. Rapping became a part of my life.
From where did you get the willpower to come out of the phase and not be chair-bound, stand on your feet again?
As I told you. That my childhood was very good, very entertaining and fun. I was surrounded by happiness all the time. I used to run after dragonflies, butterflies. I used to run after fireflies. I was connected with nature. I used to be very happy. In my life’s dictionary, there was no word as impossible. I feel I got this from my father, I can relate to my father because my father is also like that. He is a very strong person. His name is Sher Khan, maybe because of him, I got this strength and my willpower. That is very strong and my soft side bubbly, cute, sometimes I am also innocent comes from my mother. It’s not always that I take my stand. I am stubborn. It’s not always that I’m ahead in life, sometimes I also feel shy. I also have tantrums and I am also dumb at times. It’s not that I am brave, I am always smart. so all these things. Have come from my mother’s side. But as I said when I was kid things were different and suddenly everything changed and there were restrictions. I always stayed like a free bird who couldn’t be confined to a room. There were many things involved which I don’t want to mention as I respect things as they were for my betterment. There were traumas in life because of which everything happened. But I believe had I not gone through these experiences, I would have not reached where I am in life today. Everything happens for a reason. Now, I am becoming a better version of myself.
How was the phase and what kept you going?
Will power. Which has always been there. My heart is stubborn and this is Khandzadi. Right. So those were the circumstances. I ran away from the house to pursue my passion. I did not run just once, I ran five times and during these times a few things happened with me, which led to my health condition.
How does it feel that now you have your parent’s support?
I am so happy. I am blessed and God heard me. I wanted this. Prayers of parents are very important, they are the reason for your success. There is a prayer of your parents behind your success. It’s been so many years since I left home and I never got this chance which I am getting now. That’s why things were not moving forward. Because some people were supportive and some people were not. Today. I don’t see any barrier in front of me. I don’t see any boundaries. Now everyone is in my support and you feel proud. I wanted to see in the eyes of my dad that he is proud of me. He was against the things I always wanted to do and now I don’t see any boundaries. I was thinking somewhere. I don’t know. What I am doing. Am I doing it right or not? Now I am sure, whatever I am doing, maybe this is right. That’s why my mom and dad are with me today.
Do you think language can still be a barrier as you want to work in OTT and films?
Language problem now is not there. I have improved a lot. I have worked really hard. I am still working on it. I am looking forward to good work. Even if there is a rejection, I am going to take it in my stride. But earlier, I used to go for auditions. I won’t be able to do that now because I am more focused on music. Right now, I have to move ahead in music. But like I say, going with the flow. If something else comes in the flow. Then I will take it along.
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